Everything is energy. We are energy beings. Our bodies are made up of 30 to 50 trillion atoms, and these atoms are over 99.9 percent empty space. The dense, material part of an atom appears out of nowhere as particle matter and then disappears back into nowhere (the energy field). This means that at a fundamental level the human body is endlessly shifting from a physical form to an energy field. In fact, at a given moment, the human body is less than .01 percent physical. It is the same for other lifeforms and material objects, as well, because everything is made up of atoms. Emotions are energy fields that exist in the body, including repressed emotions. These repressed emotions can be harmful to an individual and can interfere with her physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual wellbeing. There are many healing methods available today that can be used to release repressed emotions. The Emotion CodeOne of the first books I read on energy work was The Emotion Code by Dr. Bradley Nelson. He does a great job of moving through all of the complicated material with a lay friendly approach. He has developed a method for releasing trapped emotions that anyone can do on her own or with the help of a skilled practitioner. After reading his book, my friend Aimee and I went to one of Dr. Nelson's workshops in New York City. It was great to see the process of releasing trapped emotions in person and to practice with one another. The first step involves testing the muscles to receive a yes or no response from the body. Accurate testing is crucial in order to be successful with the method. A person can test alone or with a partner. While in New York, Aimee and I worked together and received strong “yes” and weak “no” responses from our bodies—just what we were looking to find. I felt confident in our answers in this step which allowed us to be successful in the second step—releasing trapped emotions. Once back home in Virginia, I wasn't convinced of the reliability of the answers that I received while muscle testing on my own. Without Aimee to practice with, I soon grew frustrated, and my experience with the Emotion Code faded into the background. That is, until I was having a problem with one of my ears. Using the Emotion Code for a Blocked Eustachian TubeMy right eustachian tube was so inflamed it was closed and had fluid rolling around in it. Fortunately, it wasn't causing me any real pain, but it was disconcerting. I tried the traditional, Western medicinal approach for six months, which meant having multiple appointments with various doctors and taking antibiotics, antihistamine, and a steroid dose pack. Nothing worked. An ENT suggested having my ear drained, an option that involved a surgical incision. I didn't want any part of that. Running out of options was the impetus to give the Emotion Code another try, this time with a certified practitioner, Josh. I worked with Josh remotely, on the phone for a 20-minute appointment. He made a connection to my energy, then stood in as my proxy and muscle tested himself to gain answers from my body. At the end of the session Josh told me, “Your ear is now happy.” “Well, I can assure you that it is not,” I snipped. “After the release of trapped emotions and other energies, it can take a few days for processing,” Josh informed me. “Your body is indicating that it needs about 48 hours to process and heal.” After we hung up, Josh sent me a transcript of the session by email. Transcript from the Session with JoshRight Ear 1. Incus Misalignment Trapped Emotion: Helplessness Trapped Emotion: Frustration (not yours) Psychic Trauma: The trapped emotions creating this were Insecurity and Unsupported. 2. Eustachian Tube unhappy Trapped Emotion: Helplessness Trapped Emotion: Lack of Control Now Happy! 4. Connective Tissue imbalanced Trapped Emotion: Panic 5. Psychic Trauma from age 38. The emotions creating this were Discouragement and Frustration. 6. Sinus Congestion Trapped Emotion: Taken for Granted age 18 Trapped Emotion: Shock Ear now showing happy! The Experience that Made Me a BelieverWas my ear really happy? There appeared to be no change. I could still feel the pressure and hear the fluid rattling around in my head. My appointment had been at 4:00 PM on a Wednesday, and when I awoke on Friday morning my head felt like it was in a well. In my estimation, the symptomatic problems of my ear had been magnified tenfold. I was miserable. Around 4:00 PM that day, I was standing in my bathroom straightening my hair when it sounded like a river ran through my head. The sound and sensation were alarming. I stopped what I was doing, stood very still to see if I could discern what had happened, and observed that my ear was clear. I shook my head gently. The rumble of fluid was gone. The pressure was gone. My ear was open. Since then I have not had any other problems with my eustachian tube. This experience was so concrete and tangible, there was no denying it. The Heart-WallJosh and I also worked together on what Bradley Nelson terms the Heart-Wall. The concept is simple enough. It is a wall of energy that is made of trapped emotions. The ego sees it as a protective device to keep out painful feelings. I started building a wall around my heart when I was about two years old and began the process of dismantling it during a five-week retreat at Omega Institute in 2010. I reconnected with that tender love that had become buried deep inside and learned that when my heart is open and vulnerable it is beautiful. When I read about the concept of a Heart-Wall, I wanted to make sure that the many unconscious layers of trapped emotions guarding my heart were released, so I worked with Josh to remove my Heart-Wall. It is a lot harder to measure the intangible, and I felt unsure whether the work was making a difference in my life. Mortar on BricksMy journey to uncover repressed emotions continued with an appointment with well-known Intuitive Soul Reader, Maryann Russell. I listened back to a recording of the session recently to refresh my memory and to attempt to better understand her words—the session was raw and pure. “I went on a first date with this guy two weeks ago, and he suggested that we also do something the following Friday night. When I hadn’t heard from him by Thursday evening to make plans, I was feeling really bothered. I assumed that he wasn’t going to call, and I was really upset. I mean, my heart really ached. It was ridiculous—it’s not like I have feelings for him.” I complained. "What are you doing right now?" Maryann asked. “Trying to explain how much heartache I caused myself for no reason. The guy even called on Friday, and we went on the date. All that wasted energy and heartache, it was all for...” Maryann cut me off, "What are you doing right now?" “I’m not sure. I don’t know what you are asking me,” I responded. “You are putting up a wall around your heart, Lovie,” Maryann kindly explained. At the time I believed that I must not be explaining myself very well, and so I kept retelling the story. And she kept stopping me. “What are you doing?” Maryann asked. “You were feeling rejected. And it is painful.” “Yeah, but I wasn’t even being rejected. I just thought he wasn’t going to call. That shouldn’t be so upsetting,” I interjected. “What are you doing right now?” She just kept asking like a broken record. “You are laying mortar on bricks around your heart.” “I don’t understand what you’re talking about,” I practically yelled. “You have repressed the emotion of rejection all of your life and not allowed yourself to feel it. You are doing that again now,” she said. “By not honoring your emotions, you are dismissing your own feelings and yourself. Allow yourself to feel the pain. Just sit with those feelings of rejection and come to know what it really feels like instead of avoiding it.” What I was doing in Maryann's office that day was trying to figure out with my head why I was so pained by what I perceived as a very minor incident. My feelings didn't seem to fit the crime, so to speak. But feelings are feelings; we don’t need to try to change them or analyze them. They are honest. When we go into analysis, we abandon ourselves and don’t allow ourselves to touch the pain inside. It is in this way that the emotion becomes repressed or minimized. And we begin laying mortar on bricks. The BodyGuards
The Bodyguards was started in a classroom setting with one live model. He did several poses, and that’s how the composition was created. In one of the poses, he was on his back with his arms in the air. I was only able to place the figures while in class, so the remaining work was done in my studio.
I have trouble with faces, and hands, and hair, and there was a lot to contend with in this painting. I had fun adding hats and gloves, and I used collage to create the jewelry and clothing and to give the piece some texture. I painted a stylized face on the central figure. This painting is more graphic than most of my work, and I wasn't consistent in the way that I handled the paint, but I am happy with it because of the feeling that it invokes inside of me. This painting marked a beginning in my journey of breaking free and beginning to understand the impact that repressed emotions have on our physical and emotional wellbeing. All the alternative healing modalities that I have studied agree that repressed emotions are keeping our energy blocked and in an unhealthy state and work to improve the energy flow. Despite all the wonderful experiences I had with my eustachian tube and my new understanding of the Heart-Wall, a missing link to find wholeness still remained. I felt compelled to continue searching and learning until I met Mada Dalian and finally knew that what I had been seeking was already inside me. She introduced me to the Dalian Method, which is an advanced healing system that bypasses the mind and initiates a journey into the unconscious to explore, heal, and grow beyond what the conscious mind could ever fathom.
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AuthorMadeleine Newkirk, Artist, Spiritual Junkie, Dalian Method and Art Process Facilitator. Archives
November 2021
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